Friday, December 11, 2015

‘Writing my obituary’ – by K.J.S.Chatrath



 Not noticing any new post by me on the Facebook for 10 long days, half a dozen of my friends got together on a conference call.

‘Well, our friend Chat used to be very active on the Facebook- about 10 posts a day and now there has been no new post for ten full days, so one must conclude that the inevitable has happened’  said the oldest of my friends initiating the conference. 

‘Oh merde’, exclaimed my friend who was learning French at the local Aliance Francaise.

‘He was quite a rummy, that chappie Chat’, said one of my friends who is an avid fan of P.G. Wodehouse. 

‘Another vintage model gone’ sighed  my friend involved with the activities of INTACH. 

‘Since he was an atheist, he couldn’t have been admitted in ‘hell’, though I personally feel he was fully qualified for it, and of course he was under qualified for an entry to heaven’ said another  one of my ‘friends’ and added, ‘Wonder where do such fellows go after death.’

‘Good heavens’, was all that my holy religious type friend could say. 

‘What the hell’ was what another disappointed  friend added.  

‘The chappie hadn’t lost it yet but the poor thing had started losing things lately-  you know, passport, suitcase and that sort of rummy. Yes but one thing the old scoundrel didn’t lose till the end was his sense of humour’,  interjected the Wodehouse admirer friend. 

‘Tut, tut, said the politically correct type reminding all of the old limerick ‘Of the gone and the dead, nothing but the good shall be said’!

And then there was a dead silence. The friend chairing the conference call said, ‘Friends, a new entry on FB by Chat has been just noticed’ he divulged. 

‘What! Does it mean that he has managed to get an FB connection up there’ queried a friend.

‘Hell  no. It means that he is travelling and having a chilled beer some where in the world and here we are trying desperately to find some good things to say about the rogue’  said the friend chairing the meeting  and concluded  by announcing that the meeting was over but thoughtfully added, ‘Let’s have a drink to it!’